Will Vs. WillPower
As we are heading into the holiday season, we are constantly bombarded by extra food choices during our day. Many of my clients feel so much peer pressure to indulge or picked on for not indulging at times. And sometimes, they just feel overwhelmed by all the different types of foods that come their way on a daily basis and they don’t know what to do!
- Get yourself centered before you even go into work or to that party. Its important to get clear on what’s important to you so your own desires are not bamboozled by someone else’s!
This is where we use our will. When we have a strong desire to commit to our values, what’s truly important to us and our goals or anything that brings us joy, we will do almost anything to maintain that. This is what needs to be practiced at times like these too.
- Are you being bullied or questioned because you aren’t indulging in the constant donut/brownie/cookie fondue room? Realize that the bully-er or question-er is projecting their own discomfort onto you. Stand in your power and do what feels right to you based on what you truly want. Not by what you feel you need to do to make someone else feel comfortable. What you put into your body and how you treat yourself and your body is all about you – not someone else.
- And remember, you can change your mind too. If you are in the moment, and all of a sudden something does sound good to you then you have the free will to make that choice too. This is exercising our will. Will comes without resistance, pain, force or a feeling of denial/guilt/shame. Will is in-line to what is true for you at any given moment, not because your decision is fear based or calculated.
2. Do not deny yourself! Denying ourselves something we actually enjoy is an ED (eating disorder) symptom. And when we say “no” to something because its backed by the phrase “because I shouldn’t” …that is denial. That isn’t based on anything that comes from your gut/soul/centered self. That’s coming from a place of fear. Or a false belief that you can’t have certain things because they don’t get you to your goals or they don’t make you a “healthy” person or whatever is important to you.
Exercising your will is all about choosing, from a grounded, centered place, what’s best for you at any given moment. This doesn’t mean it’s planned or on some sort of track, this is truly being in the present moment and feeling into what makes sense for you right now!
***If you missed the first Body Trust program, look for the next one in 2022 and begin to really listen and communicate fully with your body*
3. Focus on what you want vs. what you don’t want. Meaning, what action can I take that would be provide me with the satisfaction I’m looking for AND maintain my goals or values or what’s important to me. What can I do. Vs. what do I have to do or what do I have to give-up. This is why I often say, you can have your cake and eat it too. You always can, when you are choosing from a centered, grounded place. You are always choosing to take care of yourself. So sometimes that means, yes, I will have the cookie, and it feels good to have half and leave the rest. Or I’m going to try two bites of that cake and then I’m going to go take a walk for my break. When we choose from these places, we are employing real will and real self-care. We identify what we want,(in this case the cookie), and what we need, (in this case, the walk and change of environment, a mental and movement break) at the same time. Freely and easily giving ourselves those very things. Instead of living in duality and should and should not or extremes of all or nothing, we really can have our “cake and eat it too” when we work with ourselves.
Often times, clients have said, “I don’t have any will power”. And the truth of the matter is, you do have power. You have lots of power. But some choose not to actually step into it. You have power of choice all the time and you are choosing to make certain choices. The choices or in these scenarios, food and drink, are not just flying into your mouth against your “will”. These are actual choices that you are making. Instead of just saying “there was nothing I could do”, step into your power and begin to align your values/desires with your actions. Here’s where it gets real. I’ll have clients say all the time, I want to be healthier, I want to eat healthier, I want to lose weight and yet, there actions are still in-line with making choices that potentially support a different type of lifestyle.
What are your own beliefs about what a healthy or unhealthy person means? People often assume they have to give up their world of eating pleasure to be healthy. Because of that belief, it keeps them desiring or obsessing about those same foods, which then becomes a higher priority or energy focus than the idea of being healthy. Make sense?
So get real with what your true wants and desires are. Not because others say you “should”.
What are those – for real? Based only on what you want or don’t want, not what others or your doctor or someone else in your life thinks. Do you actually want to be “healthier?” Are you even as far away from it as you think? What does being “healthier” even look like to you? In your ideal world, what does that look like to you?. What do you think you have to give up (you may not have to really give up anything)? Do you want to feel different than you do right now? Maybe you are ok with how you feel?
Get clear on what it is you even want for yourself. How much of that can you start to give yourself right now! We often delay allowing ourselves to feel joy. To experience things that really make us feel good or happy. What can you do for yourself right now. What can you change in your daily routine right now that could make things a little lighter and brighter for you. Whatever that is, just go for it! Don’t delay! And start stepping into that super power of yours right now!
If you would like to work together or ask a few questions, feel free to sign-up for a phone meet and greet here – https://wayoflifenutrition.as.me/meetandgreetphonecall
If you are ready to make an appointment and want to get in the books ASAP – then choose between in-person and virtual here:
In-person Initial Consultation = https://wayoflifenutrition.as.me/In-personinitial
Virtual Initial Consultation = https://wayoflifenutrition.as.me/Initialvirtualconsult
Photo by Miguel Bruna on Unsplash
Registered Dietitian Nutritionist
Nicole is recognized state-wide and nationally as a Registered Dietitian and is also a Certified dietitian through the state of Wisconsin. She is also a Board Certified Sports Dietitian and a Certified Personal Trainer and Physical Fitness Instructor.
Nicole’s areas of expertise include: Wellness and lifestyle coaching, weight management, behavior modification, eating disorders, vegetarian lifestyles, gluten-free living, sports nutrition, recipe and menu design and development.